"Sprockets" was a recurring comedy sketch on NBC's "Saturday Night Live" (SNL) from April 1989 to November 1993. Created by and starring Mike Myers, the sketch parodied German stereotypes through the character of Dieter, a bored, disaffected West German expressionist and minimalist who hosted a fictional television talk show. Dieter interviewed celebrities with barely concealed disinterest, often steering the conversation toward his "limited" monkey, Klaus, perched on a miniature column. Myers based Dieter on a waiter he encountered at The Cameron House in Toronto and German musician Klaus Nomi, after whom he named the monkey.
From Sketch to Screenplay: The Vision of Dieter's Day
The popularity of "Sprockets" led to the development of a feature-length film titled "Dieter's Day." Production designer Bo Welch, known for his work on "Beetlejuice" and "Edward Scissorhands," was slated to direct, marking his directorial debut. Myers was set to star, reportedly receiving $20 million for the role, alongside Will Ferrell, David Hasselhoff, and Jack Black. The film was scheduled for a summer 2001 release, with filming expected to begin in August 2000.
The plot revolved around Dieter's pet monkey, Klaus, being kidnapped. The script, considered by some to be one of the funniest never made, depicted a desperate Dieter venturing to Los Angeles to rescue Klaus and the ratings for Sprockets plummet. He is aided by his American cousin Bob Sheeder (Will Ferrell) and expert monkey tracker Daryl Hanes (Jack Black). With Klaus gone, "Baywatch" moved ahead of "Sprockets" as the top-rated show in Germany.
The Script That Never Was: Humor and Potential
The "Sprockets" script showcased an intricate plot and clever humor. One of the reasons comedy is so frustrating is because you never truly know if something is funny until you try it out. And sometimes you can talk yourself out of something being funny before you try it. That seems to have happened here. Because this is easily funnier than 90% of the comedies we’ve seen in the past decade. EASILY. And it’s definitely better than any live action movies Michael Myers has made since 2000.
The script included memorable moments such as Dieter reading Nietzsche as a 10-year-old boy, and a flashback where young Dieter and his mom eat on a coffin. It also featured humorous exchanges, such as:
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- DIETER: “I must find Klaus. Tell me everything.”
- DARYL: “Well, there is a secret society of horrible, despicable degenerates, sort of like a monkey underground. They do things to monkeys you couldn’t even imagine.”
- DIETER: “What, have sex with them?”
- DARYL: “Jeez, no! That’s awful.
Another exchange between Dieter and Gena at a Hollywood party:
- GENA: “Hi. I’m really glad you could make it.”
- DIETER: “I never miss a decadent expression of bourgeois hyperbole.”
- GENA: “You mean a party?
The script also has Dieter getting a back rub, Dieter remembers Klaus:
- DIETER: (emotional) “This reminds me of the times Klaus would scratch my back.”
- DISSOLVE TO CLOSE-UP - A MONKEY’S PAW - Is scratching Dieter.
Creative Differences and Legal Battles: The Downfall of "Dieter's Day"
Despite the promising premise and cast, "Dieter's Day" was canceled in June 2000 due to Myers' dissatisfaction with the script. Myers reportedly felt that Dieter was too passive. Myers contended that he only asked for more time to work on the script. Less than a week after Myers informed Universal Pictures of his decision, the studio sued Myers for their $3.8 million spent in pre-production costs. A month later, Myers was hit with a second lawsuit, this time from Imagine Entertainment, which claimed that "He [Myers] claimed he had not approved the screenplay. Who wrote the screenplay--Myers," Imagine claims Myers backed out after it and Universal agreed to his demands for more pay and millions of dollars were spent in pre-production. "This was not the first time Myers engaged in such conduct," the suit contended.
Universal Pictures sued Myers for breach of contract, seeking $5 million for preproduction costs. The studio argued that Myers had already approved the "Sprockets" script for the shoot, which was scheduled to begin in August. Myers countered that he hadn't approved the script and that "the cornerstone" of the deal was that he "had no obligation" until he had literally signed off on the final draft.
Myers stated, "I cannot, in good conscience, accept $20 million and cheat moviegoers who pay their hard-earned money to see my work by making a movie with an unacceptable script." Universal snuck in a complaint that Myers first agreed to take only $10 million for Sprockets but renegotiated for twice as much after Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me proved to be one of 1999’s biggest hits.
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Imagine Entertainment filed their own suit against Myers in early July, seeking $30 million plus damages. “Brian and Ron wanted a movie, not a lawsuit,” said Imagine lawyer Bert Fields, “but Mr. Myers left them no choice. Myers countersued Universal a few weeks later, accusing the studio of fraud, deceit, negligent misrepresentation, emotional distress, assault, invasion of privacy and defamation. “This case presents a classic example of a movie studio placing short-sightedness and greed above artistic integrity,” he said. Myers was also mad that Universal gave his address to a process server, whom he described as “stalkeresque, thug-like, outrageous and reckless.” Myers and his wife became ensnared in a high speed car chase with the server, he claimed, one that nearly ended with Myers crashing into his own garage.
Steven Spielberg even got involved, attempting to mediate between Myers and Universal/Imagine. However, Spielberg failed.
Settlement and Aftermath: The Mystery of the "Sprockets" Movie
In August, Universal, Imagine, and Myers settled out of court. Part of the settlement stipulated that Myers would allow Universal and Imagine to co-produce his next original comedy.
There is a widespread belief that 2003’s The Cat in The Hat is the Sprockets settlement movie, but “insiders” quoted in a 2002 Hollywood Reporter piece insisted it was not. Myers was just a replacement Cat, they said, taking up the titular role after Tim Allen bowed out. The Cat in The Hat was famously eviscerated by critics. Rolling Stone called it bloated, vulgar, and exploitative.
Read also: Espionage and betrayal: The Dieter Gerhardt case.